Lesson 1:
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.'
After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob , after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.
The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.
When she gets to the bathroom , her husband asks, 'Who was that?'
'It was Bob the next door neighbor,' she replies.
'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
Lesson 2:
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.
They rub it and a Genie comes out.
The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'
'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk 'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world..'
Puff! She's gone.
'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.'
Puff! He's gone.
'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager.
The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch'
Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.
Lesson 3
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?'
The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson 4
A turkey was chatting with a bull.
'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.'
'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients.'
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Moral of the story:
Bull Sh*t might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there..
Lesson 5
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.
As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who sh*ts on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of sh*t is your
friend.
(3) And when you're in deep sh*t, it's best to keep
your mouth shut!
Showing posts with label Living. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Living. Show all posts
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.
A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a
silk paper wrapped package:
This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.'
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.
She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago.
She has never put it on , was saving it for a special occasion.
Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box
next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house,
his wife had just died.
He turned to me and said:'Never save something for a special occasion.
Every day in your life is a special occasion'.
I still think those words changed my life.Now I read more and clean less.
I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.
I spend more time with my family, and less at work.
I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived
up to, not survived through.I no longer keep anything.
I use crystal glasses every day...
I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like
it.I don't save my special perfume for special occasions,
I use it whenever I want to.
The words 'Someday...' and ' One Day...' are fading away from my
dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing I want to see,
listen or do it now...
I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if
she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can
tell.
I think she might have called her relatives and closest
friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past
quarrels.
I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her
favorite food.
It's these small things that I would regret not doing,
if I knew my time had come..
Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.
Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.
silk paper wrapped package:
This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.'
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.
She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago.
She has never put it on , was saving it for a special occasion.
Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box
next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house,
his wife had just died.
He turned to me and said:'Never save something for a special occasion.
Every day in your life is a special occasion'.
I still think those words changed my life.Now I read more and clean less.
I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.
I spend more time with my family, and less at work.
I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived
up to, not survived through.I no longer keep anything.
I use crystal glasses every day...
I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like
it.I don't save my special perfume for special occasions,
I use it whenever I want to.
The words 'Someday...' and ' One Day...' are fading away from my
dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing I want to see,
listen or do it now...
I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if
she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can
tell.
I think she might have called her relatives and closest
friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past
quarrels.
I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her
favorite food.
It's these small things that I would regret not doing,
if I knew my time had come..
Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.
Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.
Friday, August 21, 2009
The Wooden Bowl
I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year old grandson.
The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.
The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor.
When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
'We must do something about father,' said the son. 'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.
Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.
Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.
The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor.
He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded,
'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.
' The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless.
Then tears started to stream down their cheeks.
Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.
That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason,
neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens,
how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
I've learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents,
you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.
I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life..'
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.
You need to be able to throw something back
I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you
But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others,
your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you
I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.
People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year old grandson.
The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.
The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor.
When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
'We must do something about father,' said the son. 'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.
Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.
Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.
The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor.
He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded,
'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.
' The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless.
Then tears started to stream down their cheeks.
Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.
That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason,
neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens,
how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
I've learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents,
you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.
I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life..'
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.
You need to be able to throw something back
I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you
But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others,
your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you
I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.
People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Some interesting facts about ourselves ……………………
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
One human hair can support 3 kg (6.6 lb).
The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
Women will be finished reading this by now.
Men are still busy checking their thumbs.
One human hair can support 3 kg (6.6 lb).
The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
Women will be finished reading this by now.
Men are still busy checking their thumbs.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Western and Asian approaches towards life
Blue --> Westerner
Red --> Asian
The Child
B: The kid is going to be independent and make his/her own living.
R: Work, live and all for the kids, the centre of life.
The Boss
B: The boss is part of the team.
R: The boss is a Fierce god.
Elderly in day to day life
B: When old, there is snoopy for companionship.
R: When old, guarantee will not be lonely, as long as willing to baby-sit the grandkids
Handling of Problems
B: Take any steps to solve the problems.
R: Try to avoid conflicts, and if can, don't leave any trail.
Travelling
B: Love sightseeing and enjoy the scenery.
R: Taking picture is the most important, scenery is just for the background
In the restaurant
B: Talk softly and gently in the restaurant.
R: Talk and laugh loudly like they own the restaurant.
Sundays on the Road
B: Enjoy weekend relaxing peacefully.
R: Enjoy weekend in crowded places, like going to the mall.
Queue when Waiting
B: Queuing in an orderly manner.
R: Queuing?! What's that?
Anger
B: Show that I am angry.
R: I am angry, but still smiling... (beware!)
Contacts
B: Contact to related person only.
R: Contact everyone everywhere, business very successful.
Punctuality
B: on time.
R: in time.
Way of Life
B: individualism, think of himself or herself.
R: enjoy gathering with family and friends, solving their problems, and know each other's business (keh poh).
Opinion
B: Talk to the point
R: Talk around the circle, especially if different opinions
Red --> Asian
The Child
B: The kid is going to be independent and make his/her own living.
R: Work, live and all for the kids, the centre of life.
The Boss
B: The boss is part of the team.
R: The boss is a Fierce god.
Elderly in day to day life
B: When old, there is snoopy for companionship.
R: When old, guarantee will not be lonely, as long as willing to baby-sit the grandkids
Handling of Problems
B: Take any steps to solve the problems.
R: Try to avoid conflicts, and if can, don't leave any trail.
Travelling
B: Love sightseeing and enjoy the scenery.
R: Taking picture is the most important, scenery is just for the background
In the restaurant
B: Talk softly and gently in the restaurant.
R: Talk and laugh loudly like they own the restaurant.
Sundays on the Road
B: Enjoy weekend relaxing peacefully.
R: Enjoy weekend in crowded places, like going to the mall.
Queue when Waiting
B: Queuing in an orderly manner.
R: Queuing?! What's that?
Anger
B: Show that I am angry.
R: I am angry, but still smiling... (beware!)
Contacts
B: Contact to related person only.
R: Contact everyone everywhere, business very successful.
Punctuality
B: on time.
R: in time.
Way of Life
B: individualism, think of himself or herself.
R: enjoy gathering with family and friends, solving their problems, and know each other's business (keh poh).
Opinion
B: Talk to the pointR: Talk around the circle, especially if different opinions
Thursday, April 23, 2009
More household tips...
Ants Problem:
Keep the skin of cucumbers near the place or ant hole.
To get pure and clean ice:
Boil water first before freezing.
To make the mirror shine:
Clean with spirit
To remove chewing gum from clothes:
Keep the cloth in the freezer for an hour.
To whiten white clothes
Soak white clothes in hot water with a slice of lemon for 10 minutes 10
To give a shine to hair:
Add one teaspoon of vinegar to hair, then wash hair.
To get maximum juice out of lemons:
Soak lemons in hot water for one hour, and then juice them
Keep the skin of cucumbers near the place or ant hole.
To get pure and clean ice:
Boil water first before freezing.
To make the mirror shine:
Clean with spirit
To remove chewing gum from clothes:
Keep the cloth in the freezer for an hour.
To whiten white clothes
Soak white clothes in hot water with a slice of lemon for 10 minutes 10
To give a shine to hair:
Add one teaspoon of vinegar to hair, then wash hair.
To get maximum juice out of lemons:
Soak lemons in hot water for one hour, and then juice them
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
HOUSEHOLD TIPS
To avoid smell of cabbage while cooking:
Keep a piece of bread on the cabbage in the vessel while cooking.
To rid the smell of fish from your hands:
Wash your hands with a little apple vinegar.
To avoid tears while cutting onions:
Chew gum.
To boil potatoes quickly:
Skin one potato from one side only before boiling.
To check freshness of fish:
Put it in a bowl of cold water. If the fish floats, it's fresh.
To check freshness of eggs:
Put the egg in water. If it becomes horizontal, it's fresh. If it becomes slanting, its 3-4 days old. If it becomes vertical, its 10 days old. If it floats, it's stale.
To remove ink from clothes:
Put toothpaste on the ink spots generously and let it dry completely, then wash.
To skin sweet potatoes quickly:
Soak in cold water immediately after boiling.
To get rid of mice or rats:
Sprinkle black pepper in places where you find mice or rats. They will run away.
To get rid of mosquitoes at night:
Keep leaves of mint near your bed or pillows and in around the room.
Keep a piece of bread on the cabbage in the vessel while cooking.
To rid the smell of fish from your hands:
Wash your hands with a little apple vinegar.
To avoid tears while cutting onions:
Chew gum.
To boil potatoes quickly:
Skin one potato from one side only before boiling.
To check freshness of fish:
Put it in a bowl of cold water. If the fish floats, it's fresh.
To check freshness of eggs:
Put the egg in water. If it becomes horizontal, it's fresh. If it becomes slanting, its 3-4 days old. If it becomes vertical, its 10 days old. If it floats, it's stale.
To remove ink from clothes:
Put toothpaste on the ink spots generously and let it dry completely, then wash.
To skin sweet potatoes quickly:
Soak in cold water immediately after boiling.
To get rid of mice or rats:
Sprinkle black pepper in places where you find mice or rats. They will run away.
To get rid of mosquitoes at night:
Keep leaves of mint near your bed or pillows and in around the room.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Aged 50+.....don't you think this is interesting?
Time is like a river
You cannot touch the same water twice,
because the flow that has passed will never pass again
Enjoy every moment of life.....
For those that are already 50, start practicing
For those almost 50, get ready.
For those where 50 is a long way off, help your parents do it.
For Those Over 50 Years Old
1. Focus on enjoying people, not on indulging in or accumulating material things.
2. Plan to spend whatever you have saved. You deserve to enjoy it and the few healthy years you have left. Travel if you can afford it.
3. Don't leave anything for your children or loved ones to quarrel about. By leaving something, you may even cause more trouble when you are gone.
3. Live in the here and now, not in the yesterdays and tomorrows. It is only today that you can handle. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow may not even happen.
4. Enjoy your grandchildren (if blessed with any) but don't be their full time baby sitter. You have no moral obligation to take care of them. Don't have any guilt about refusing to baby sit anyone's kids, including your own grandkids. Your parental obligation is to your children.
After you have raised them into responsible adults, your duties of child-rearing and babysitting are finished. Let your children raise their own off-springs.
5. Accept physical weakness, sickness and other physical pains. It is a part of the ageing process. Enjoy whatever your health can allow.
6. Enjoy what you are and what you have right now. Stop working hard for what you do not have. If you don't have them, it's probably too late.
7. Enjoy your life with your spouse, children, grandchildren and friends. People, who truly love you, love you for yourself, not for what you have. Anyone who loves you for what you have will just give you misery. And you'd probably know that by now.
8. Forgive and accept forgiveness. Forgive yourself and others. Enjoy peace of mind and peace of soul.
9. Not trying to be morbid, but befriend death. It's a natural part of the life cycle. Don't be afraid of it. Death is the beginning of a new and better life. So, prepare yourself not for death but for a new life with the Almighty.
10. Be at peace with your Creator. For He is all you have after you leave this sojourn on Earth.
You cannot touch the same water twice,
because the flow that has passed will never pass again
Enjoy every moment of life.....
For those that are already 50, start practicing
For those almost 50, get ready.
For those where 50 is a long way off, help your parents do it.
For Those Over 50 Years Old
1. Focus on enjoying people, not on indulging in or accumulating material things.
2. Plan to spend whatever you have saved. You deserve to enjoy it and the few healthy years you have left. Travel if you can afford it.
3. Don't leave anything for your children or loved ones to quarrel about. By leaving something, you may even cause more trouble when you are gone.
3. Live in the here and now, not in the yesterdays and tomorrows. It is only today that you can handle. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow may not even happen.
4. Enjoy your grandchildren (if blessed with any) but don't be their full time baby sitter. You have no moral obligation to take care of them. Don't have any guilt about refusing to baby sit anyone's kids, including your own grandkids. Your parental obligation is to your children.
After you have raised them into responsible adults, your duties of child-rearing and babysitting are finished. Let your children raise their own off-springs.
5. Accept physical weakness, sickness and other physical pains. It is a part of the ageing process. Enjoy whatever your health can allow.
6. Enjoy what you are and what you have right now. Stop working hard for what you do not have. If you don't have them, it's probably too late.
7. Enjoy your life with your spouse, children, grandchildren and friends. People, who truly love you, love you for yourself, not for what you have. Anyone who loves you for what you have will just give you misery. And you'd probably know that by now.
8. Forgive and accept forgiveness. Forgive yourself and others. Enjoy peace of mind and peace of soul.
9. Not trying to be morbid, but befriend death. It's a natural part of the life cycle. Don't be afraid of it. Death is the beginning of a new and better life. So, prepare yourself not for death but for a new life with the Almighty.
10. Be at peace with your Creator. For He is all you have after you leave this sojourn on Earth.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Hard boiled eggs
Cooking hard boiled eggs can be a hassle because you have to kor hui (jaga api) or kor chui (jaga air). My dear friend, KS was so kind to share this method of cooking the eggs whereby you don't have to worry whether they are over-cooked or under-cooked.
1) Place two pieces of tissue paper inside the rice cooker and sprinkle them with water.
2) Put in the eggs.
3) Close the lid and press "Cook" button.
4) Wait till the button jumps up. When it does, TURN OFF THE ELECTRICITY POWER. Do not leave them too long inside the rice cooker after cooked ...only do so if you prefer a harder egg yolk.
5) The eggs are ready.
The speed is faster than using ordinary boiling method. This is because the water sprinkled on the tissue will turn into steam and compressed inside the rice cooker to cook the eggs. You can peel the egg shells off very easily. The egg yolks will turn out just nice, not too dry. And the best part is -you don't have to do any washing nor cleaning at all.
1) Place two pieces of tissue paper inside the rice cooker and sprinkle them with water.
2) Put in the eggs.
3) Close the lid and press "Cook" button.
4) Wait till the button jumps up. When it does, TURN OFF THE ELECTRICITY POWER. Do not leave them too long inside the rice cooker after cooked ...only do so if you prefer a harder egg yolk.
5) The eggs are ready.
The speed is faster than using ordinary boiling method. This is because the water sprinkled on the tissue will turn into steam and compressed inside the rice cooker to cook the eggs. You can peel the egg shells off very easily. The egg yolks will turn out just nice, not too dry. And the best part is -you don't have to do any washing nor cleaning at all.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
More simply beautiful....heaven on earth!!
Lavender Farm
Blue Sea
Earthbound Rainbow
MirrorLake
Lavender at the Foot of the Mountain
Comet (Make a wish)
The Purple Romance
Breithorn Peak ( Switzerland )
Deep Autumn
The Moon and Star on Earth
Blue Sea
Earthbound Rainbow
MirrorLake
Lavender at the Foot of the Mountain
Comet (Make a wish)
The Purple Romance
Breithorn Peak ( Switzerland )
Deep Autumn
The Moon and Star on Earth
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